Observations from my writing desk: Wednesday, April 26th, 2017

Location: Cold, little sunroom with the electric heater turned on high; cat purring a little too loudly from atop of her cat castle (yes we have one; yes she loves it; yes it’s adorable); sitting on an IKEA chair in my work clothes, slippers and a bathrobe. Basically, the most luxurious conditions one could desire.

 

Hilarity = when firmly entrenched in an imaginary world of one’s own making (aka rewriting a chapter in the third draft of a novel in progress), my husband comes into the room and asks if I have a minute to talk. What were the topics of conversation, you ask? Oh, just the essentials: the tub drain was augered with all 20 feet of the auger, so it should finally drain despite the nests of hair that accumulate in the tub each time I shampoo my head; the carcinogenic rating of my organic, frou frou shaving cream; “healthy” shaving cream options to order and the discount one can achieve by purchasing them on a specific website; and the great price on a wine I’ve recently been partnering myself with. By partnering myself with it I mean I drink it in my cold, little sunroom while wearing a bathrobe over my work clothes, talking to my cat in her tower.

 

Life is good.

 

Also, just over a week until the Muse conference. I’m thrilled and anxious. I don’t mind that combo, though.

Things I do instead of writing…

– Waste dozens of minutes on Buzzfeed. Dozens.

– Cook everything in the kitchen while blasting Count Basie on Spotify and keeping my glass of red wine nice and filled despite our frequent interludes with one another.

– Think about how Count Basie makes everything feel just a bit more classy.

– Oh yeah, what did I cook? Fried green tomatoes, even though tomatoes taste like blood. Luckily, dredging and frying them makes them taste great! So does a buttermilk bbq dipping sauce.

– Huh, there’s a spaghetti squash in here? Bake it, scrape those fake noodles out and call it pasta, then dump a jar of marinara on top. Have husband shred cheese all over the top. Mmmm.

– Refill wine glass. Silently thank Trader Joe’s for their surprisingly palatable cheap wines.

-Realize the reason they’re palatable is probably because I have no idea what a good wine is.

– Husband starts making mix cd for road trip to Maine and plays a lot of my sacred “writing music”; remember that I should be writing.

– Update tumblr with all of my latest nonsense.

– Feel guilty I’m not writing….

..

– Ok, getting on that chapter rewrite now. Going to spend dozens of minutes working on it tonight. Dozens.